I have hemmed and hawed about writing this post. But in the end, I don’t think I can sit back and keep quiet because I am deeply, deeply upset and disgusted by what has happened in our photography community in Missoula. I’m shaking as I write this. That’s how upset I am. I think it’s imperative that people are made aware of what has happened so they can make their own informed decisions, and also I want to speak to some issues this has brought up.
What am I talking about? If you missed the article in the Missoulian, please go here to read it. It is in regard to another “photographer” (I put that in quotes, because in no way should he EVER be considered a professional photographer after what he’s done) who had inappropriate sexual contact with a 17-year-old girl. Please read this article to inform yourself of the facts, and please read it before continuing on to the rest of what I have to say here. Also, please note, it is somewhat graphic in a sexual nature, so if that kind of thing disturbs you, then you may not want to read it. However, that being said, I think it’s important to know the extent of what has taken place.
Anyway…I’m not here to drag him down in the mud. He’s done that on his own. No need for me to continue that further.
But what I DO want to address are a few other things this incident has brought up.
First and foremost – what he did was NOT professional. What he did is not indicative of what the majority of photographers out there are like. And what he did is NOT ok by any stretch of the imagination by any professional – whether someone is a doctor, a teacher, a therapist….ANYBODY. No matter your profession – THAT IS NOT OKAY.
I am a member of the National Press Photographers Association. Part of that membership requires that we as photographers subscribe to a code of ethics. Honestly, I sometimes feel silly that we have to officially “subscribe” to a code of ethics. Because aren’t we all supposed to adhere to morals and ethics on a day-to-day basis regardless of our type of employment? It’s just a basic part of being a decent human being in this world we all live in and share.
But anyway – part of the code states:
“Treat all subjects with respect and dignity.”
That’s SO basic. So very, very basic. But it’s at the heart of what it is to be a good photographer, not to mention a decent human being, and is SO important. And I think this is why I am just so very upset about what has happened. I really take issue when bad things happen to good people. By placing trust in somebody, you expect that you will be treated with respect and dignity. And, for the most part, that happens. And that’s what makes living in this world great. But when it doesn’t – oh MAN it makes me furious.
One of the amazing things about being a photographer is that our clients trust us with such special, intimate moments. Whether it be on your wedding day, or during your senior session to celebrate your graduation from high school, or working with your sweet new baby or photographing your grandparents. There is always a level of trust there that should not be downplayed and should not be taken advantage of.
Ever.
Every day I’m grateful that my clients trust me enough to open up such special moments of their lives to me to document. Every DAY I’m grateful for that and place that in the highest regard in my business.
Never in a million years should your photographer (or your doctor or teacher or whomever) ask you to do something that makes you feel downright uncomfortable to your very core. If you feel something is amiss, please, please, please listen to that little voice in your head.
I oftentimes tell my clients they look beautiful in front of my camera. And it’s because I truly mean that, and generally I’m just beyond excited because we’re having so much fun during our session. I don’t say these things (and I’m sure the majority of photographers – men and women) don’t say these things with any inkling of sexual innuendo. However, if someone tells you that you are beautiful and that little voice pops up in your head and screams at you that “this is uncomfortable!” and sounds off the alarm bells – PLEASE LISTEN TO THAT VOICE.
Unfortunately, there are predators in this world. Listen to your gut instinct if you feel uncomfortable. If there were no gut instinct we wouldn’t have a phrase to describe it. PLEASE listen to that within yourself.
Predators are predators because they detect prey – here’s the actual definition:
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1.an animal that naturally preys on others.“wolves are major predators of rodents”
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2.a person or group that ruthlessly exploits others.“a website frequented by sexual predators”
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a company that tries to take over another.
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In this case, it was a young girl who was flattered by the attention and had a low self esteem. There are a lot of people “shaming” this girl, saying “she’s old enough – she should have known better.” Well, maybe she should have known better. But predators can be tricky. They can be unbelievably charming and unbelievably manipulative – and they can detect weaknesses. I’m sure we’ve all met people like that in our lives. They’re flipping dangerous.
At the end of the day, she was taken advantage of. She is a YOUNG GIRL. Don’t forget that. I don’t care how quickly kids are growing up these days – 17 is still young. At that age kids are still forming opinions of the world and of themselves and just beginning to start thinking about setting out on their own for the first time. They are, mostly, still trusting of adults. And this trust was taken advantage of.
That’s just. Not. RIGHT.
So, please, listen to your gut. This kind of behavior is not appropriate in any realm. And if something like this has happened to you, PLEASE tell someone. Don’t be afraid to tell someone. And know that the photography community in Missoula condemns what has taken place.
But also realize that there are more good people out there than there are bad. That’s important too. There are so many photographers here who truly care about their clients and would never dream of doing something like this. So, please, remember that.
Be safe out there, listen to your gut, and don’t stop believing in the goodness of others.
Taking a deep breath,
-Kristine
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Thank you for this. As a mom of a teen girl, I am disturbed by the number of comments on facebook that don’t really get what happened, or think that nothing bad happened, or that she was old enough to judge for herself. Kids may be jaded, may be more sophisticated than ever, but they are still kids, and the adults in their lives are liable for their emotional and physical safety. She is still a child, and he is absolutely a predator. Photography plays a huge, huge part of the modern teen life. It is critically important to talk about this kind of problem with as much skill and perception and honor as you did. Well done, really well done. Glad there are people like you in the photography profession.
I really don’t believe that age should be a factor, at all. He is a predator. He violated the trust given to him. Simple ethics & morals that he should have as a human being. Evidently, he doesn’t have any. If your grandparents needed a new roof & a man came to the door, gave them an estimate for replacement & they give him a down payment, then they never see the guy again. Same thing minus the sex. Predators are everywhere. It doesn’t matter what age, if they take advantage of a vulnerable person. I feel our society has lost sight of simple, basic morals & ethics because everything seems to easy, too cheap, too much easy availability & we’ve lost sight of the simple things in life, simple human decency & how to treat our fellow humans. We, as a society, have become hardened to the plight of the people around us. It is very disturbing to see what happens on a daily basis to people around us. We should be working together to create & make a better society on the foundation that has been passed down from our fore fathers. We all have to live here. This is a no-brainer, from my point of view.
EM, you’re so very welcome. I was also disturbed by the facebook comments I saw. When reading a story like this, and especially when one of the parties is unnamed (for good reason), I think a lot of people disassociate her from being a real, live person who has a family, who felt the feelings she felt, etc., etc. I wonder if those people would still behave in the same way if they took a moment to put themselves in her shoes. Or if they imagined her as being a sister, a dear friend, a cousin, etc.
I think your comment is right on regarding how much photography plays a role in a teen’s life. That’s undeniable. And thank YOU for your wonderful comment and kind words – that means so much to me. I’m glad that people are connecting with my words.
Valerie – yes, I also wish more people would pay attention to the importance of morals and ethics. The world would be a much happier, friendlier, safer place if we all remembered that is one of our core responsibilities of being a human being.
Thank you for standing up and speaking out about this issue! It is similarly infuriating to me to hear that this man took advantage of the trust that has been given to him by young girls and their parents as well. There are two points of view that I see this from: First, as having modelled previously I know first-hand that there are plenty of perverts with cameras that want to just drool over pretty young girls and look for a chance to hook up, which creates opportunity to victimize the vulnerable. I feel that highschool yearbook photogs should definitely be supervised by parents. It seems to me that Not many young girls are leery enough of the reasons why they are getting attention because they just want to feel attractive and wanted or loved. It is in no way their fault, it is the fault of the sickos that see that as an opportunity and take advantage. From an Artist’s standpoint, when you are capturing beautiful images is exhilarating, especially when you and your model feel comfortable enough to work together in collaboration. That model is opening up to you. It is somewhat emotional and should never be taken advantage of! Just because someone is beautiful, that doesn’t give you any reason to sexually objectify them! I feel that they are giving you a gift by working with you to make beautiful art.
Happy to do it, Leslie! Thanks for reading. You’re exactly right. It truly is a gift to be able to make beautiful photos of people and BOTH be able to place trust in one another, and have a great time while doing the session. It becomes an experience for both parties, and when it’s done right and respectfully, it’s absolutely incredible and one of the many reasons I love my job and love working with the people I get a chance to work with.
Kristine,
You’ve said so many things I was thinking to myself. What Dax did was inexcusable. It feels like a black eye to the photography community. In today’s world with the pressures of how we should look, there are many teenage girls with self esteem issues. As photographers, we have the ability to capture flattering photos. Our clients place their trust in how we use those photos. For him to prey upon the vulnerability of this young woman was calculated and mean.
Hi Cathy – Nice to hear from you! What he did is, sadly, a black eye to the photography community here. That’s why I felt it was imperative that we make sure people know that what he did is not the norm, and especially not the norm around here and absolutely inexcusable. Missoula photographers stand strong against such behavior!